we shall shatter this artificial world

The title of this entry originated from a part of Tracy's "note of thanks" (that's how we call our valedictory speech in UST). She'll be saying it proud later, but she and Amiel gave me a sneak preview of their speeches as early as two weeks ago.

Tracy had been told to change the word, "shatter" because it sounds heavy plus the fact that it could just appeal to the philosophical community. Amiel, perhaps for the inclusion of Fr. Ferriols, "ilundag mo beybe" safely passed the jurors. Probably, they found the phrase cute, but am not sure if everyone will have a grasp of what it truly means. Nonetheless, he was also adviced to reduce the metaphysical undertones of his address of petition (and that's the thomasian way of calling "salutation").

Amiel and Trace made highly existential speeches, close to being metaphysical but is very much meaningful. I am proud of the way these two (and the other 30ish) brilliant minds absorbed philosophy. As their welfare under my "loving" custody is coming to a technical close, I could but pray that they will carry on with their quest for meaning. I'll miss them sitting in my class, raising good questions -- nodding, even if I know that they're already half asleep (thanks for the support guys). Benjo reciting in class while converting everything to Lacan or Levinas. Kris Martus or Voltaire getting my microphone because I talk low and slow, and I need to be heard because we always talk along a "process". I shall miss them lurking around AB and at the eccle library, because of their research work, or in the case of the matronas -- sightseeing a few good philosophers. TGR and the boys' team complaining about the popularity of eccle's wonder twins. Perhaps not at YM, but I will surely miss these kids' actual company -- pulling me out of the Faculty room for some short talks and hearty laughs. Robert, dropping me off in front of sir bob, Rommel sharing his all-time hit jokes, JP harassing Peter and Peter talking of Wojtyla. The girls tracing friendster-dot-coms among themselves. The guys dreaming of becoming champions in basketball, and in engaging the lower years in their "philosophical" games. I shall miss everyone trying to have a grab of the microphone (during videoke sessions) with Tracy and Levi as the usual winners. The good talks, Kali's "new beginning" and many others.

I am so proud of what these kids have become, and Trace and Amiel's speeches will simply reveal. I am praying that they will always be spurred by the same interest for truth and meaning that they have right now. I am praying that their idealisms will never falter. I am so proud that they are able to recognize that philosophy is not but a rite of passage to another degree, to an occupation or so - but to a better self, and to better decisions in life. When requested to remove the term "shatter" from her speech, I advised Tracy to disobey and retain it, and she said that she also intends to do so. EVERYBODY DESERVES THAT HEAVY WORD. Having heard that, I was so happy -- this call for an authentic experience deserves to be heard. And yes, the call could only come from a philosopher -- an authentic philosopher.

True enough, we need to shatter accidents in order to arrive at meaning. And at times, we need to jump from our comfort zones. The things that used to numb our thoughtful sensibility to and for life, needs to annihilated. We are all confronted by a complicated world, the human challenge is to find ourselves in its midst and to conquer the world through decisions that we can die for. It is true that we dwell in the world, but it is also true that we have to act upon that same world. More than history and perhaps anything else, the most sovereign entity in this enterprise is man who grabs his life's steering wheel and determines the path he wishes to tread. This man is always entitled to his choice of path, but reason and the drive for authentic existence could just lead him to the truth and good -- and of course we talk not of those we carelessly dictate, but of the objective and authentic ones. To shatter, nonetheless, implies a kind of rebuilding. It is the moment where we identify ourselves apart from what we do not essentially need. In this stage, decisions can't be made just for pleasure, fun or perhaps because it's cute or gay. To shatter the artificial world means to choose for what is right and to die for it, to succumb into the difficulty, not because suffering makes an act noble, but because it is the only way to conquer the obstacles to an authentic life. It happens when we choose to give up the things that we could be entitled to, but are nonetheless unimportant to what we intend to become. To shatter means to sacrifice, for the sake of something higher. It means intentionally going beyond, because staying in the usual cage would only lead to a creation of endless and pointless circles. To shatter means to grab the chance of soaring high, not because what's up there is cute; but because through shattering, one becomes free.

This teacher, this intellectual midwife, or perhaps mother, is proud to hear her children speak of their thoughts and hearts that had been crystallized by four meaningful years of academic discipline. I am so proud, truly proud.

I have to warn you my beloved that life wouldn't be as easy as how it had been in college. (uhhm, had it been easy for you guys anyway) But you're fully-packed, very much loaded, it's just a matter of carrying on with the battle. With what you have right now, soar high and make us prouder. Continue your pilgrimage. Should you come back, you're forever welcome.